I was wondering what I would write about today. And then my daughter” Jessica” asked me. Why is the blog called bravemama77? Okay so if you want to know what brave is you can read the post Brave dictionary explanation..
But if you want my point on this, here goes…
I’m not brave at all.. Actually I have a fear of heights. A really bad fear. But I did something about that on New Years day. I’m sure you read the post about new years and the big hole. I just never mentioned how big or high it is… Yea, it’s big but the height is what freaks me out.. And as if that wasn’t enough the bridge moves while you’re standing on it. An expansion bridge or something like that. I wasn’t paying much attention; I was just checking what the fastest way was to get off of it when I was done… Really, what were they thinking when they made it?? Its not for those of us who have fears!!
So, as I was telling you I wanted a photo of the big hole. I’m a part time photographer praying to turn it into a full time business.. but that’s a whole other story.. let me get back to the point I’m trying to make.. I’m way off track again.
As I was saying, I wanted a photo, but I didn’t want anyone else to take it. I wanted to get it. But I was afraid. I bet if anyone saw me they would be laughing their heads off. I’m sure my family had a quite a few giggles… I crawled hands and feet looking down at the bridge. I kid you not.. until I got to the end. I couldn’t get a proper photo through the railing which meant I had to get up and take a photo. Remember the bridge is moving… really… moving… So I got up for only a few seconds took a photo and made a run for safety. Yes I know it’s safe, but I don’t feel safe anywhere near heights..
And then I checked the photo… one photo of the fear I took a chance of taking… and here it is… the big hole!!!
Getting back to my other fear is what people think of me. I wouldn’t call myself a people pleaser, more like not liking confrontation I tend to suck up things. And when I get mean in self defence I’m the one feeling like it’s all my fault. So I try not to go there. Well, what I’m trying to say is that I don’t like people talking about me.. Judging me.. It’s hurtful and this is exactly why I’m so afraid to start this blog…
I’ve only told about three people about this blog, wait, make that 4. One being my daughter and the other my best friends. My best friends wont judge me.. I’m hoping.. Lol. But even if they do I wanted assurance that I was doing the right thing.
So I first spoke to a really good friend of mine in Australia. His name is Lloyd. Anyway, when I need godly advice or my dreams interpreted Lloyd is the friend I would call on first. He always knows just what to say to give me perspective and I know he has my best interest at heart and I believe God put him on my way for this reason.
This is kinda how our conversation went… A lot of “I don’t knows” and “are you sures” but this is the basis of how the conversation went and what he had to say…
Me: Guess what Lloyd I started a blog..
Lloyd: Coolio… So the website it wordpress? Give me the link (:
So he read it and the conversation continued..
Me: Thanks my sweet friend. I do hope I get others to have faith too..
Lloyd: U sure will Post links on ur FB (:
Me: I’m too afraid!!
Lloyd: Afraid of what?
Lots of things were said in this conversation but here is the part that really stood out and made me think. God has given me these talents as a gift. What I’m doing with it is my gift to Him.. and not using it.. Well, that says it all…
Lloyd: God hasn’t given u a spirit of fear (: U can’t escape persecution, even Jesus had to endure it so might as well endure it now (: haha What have u honestly got to lose? A few friends who are judgemental anyways? But if ur gonna do it…go hard or go home (: Don’t do a half hearted job That won’t benefit anyone. People WILL judge u…but hitting home to something is more worth the persecution u will face? That’s what you have to decide (: Ur really good at writing! It’s def a God given gift.. Seriously!
And then he topped it off with..
Lloyd: I will always be ur friend even if u post it…
Lol. Yea that’s what friends are for. Proverbs 18:24 (b)
And then it got me to thinking. The word of God says 365 times “Do not be afraid” one for each day of the year. So why should I be afraid, what have I got to lose??
The blog is about finding the brave inside of you, no matter what the cost. And yes, people will judge you.. You will face trials, but how you handle it will say a lot about you.
I’m giving God all the glory with this one and so much more to come. He gave me the strength to take that photo on the 1st of January 2014.. And He will guide me on this blogging journey. All I need is to do is hold on tight. He’s got my hand in His..…
So my sweet friends… Hold on tightly, Gods got you right where He needs you most… He’s not finished with you just yet..
This “brave” mama is doing it… How about you??
With love always